


let your heart be light

by starsshinedarkly77



Category: Game Grumps
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Barely Holiday Themed, Fluff, M/M, Polyamory
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-31
Updated: 2015-12-31
Packaged: 2018-05-10 13:00:32
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,493
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5586547
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/starsshinedarkly77/pseuds/starsshinedarkly77
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>As the year comes to a close and the day of the Grumps' company holiday party approaches, Arin and Suzy form an agreement; that Arin will tell Dan how he feels before everyone goes home for the holidays. What follows is something that Arin never could have anticipated.</p>
            </blockquote>





	let your heart be light

**Author's Note:**

> A request from tumblr user aofunk for a holiday-themed egobang drabble that got way, way out of hand. I hope you all enjoy it! This is my first Game Grumps fic I've posted on ao3, and it's completely un-beta'd, so if you catch any errors, please let me know! Enjoy!

Arin wakes up suddenly and completely on the morning of the company holiday party, vaguely sweaty and with his stomach in knots. He must have been dreaming about something bad, but lying in the dark room, with Suzy still fast asleep and tucked peacefully against his side, he can’t remember what it was. As the sick, panicked feeling left over from the nightmare fades from his body, Arin feels a light twinge of annoyance. There’s no way he’s going to be able to get back to sleep now, regardless of the earliness of the hour. He was eager to fall asleep last night just so his brain would shut the fuck up for a second, so he wouldn’t have to think about today - and there he goes, he’s thinking about it already.

With a light sigh, Arin pulls the covers off and slips out of bed. Suzy turns over in the bed when he does so, the even pattern of her breathing disturbed, but she doesn’t wake, and he patters quietly out into the hallway and starts towards the kitchen.

Mochi leaps guiltily down from the counter when Arin flips the kitchen light on; he is so, so not supposed to be up there, but it’s far too early in the morning to yell at a cat. It’s too early in the morning for a Monster, as well, he decides as he flicks the fridge open and realizes the thought of drinking one of them right now turns his stomach and leaves a sour taste in his mouth. So he kicks the fridge closed and settles at the kitchen table. Usually sitting there staring into space, not doing anything with his hands would drive Arin up the wall, but today…today he’s got too much on his mind to care.

Namely, the thing dominating all his thoughts is the company holiday party, and it’s not that he’s worried so much about the nigh eight-hundred things Suzy still has to do to get everything ready to her liking, or that he’s worried his suit isn’t going to fit (he’s been working out, it’s a new suit, it has to fit, right? right?). No, what he’s worried about is the stupid, stupid, dumbass agreement he’s made with Suzy, an agreement that has to be fulfilled tonight.

See, the thing is, after this party, they’re all on vacation; all the Grumps flying or driving all over the place to spend some time with family, to unwind a little before they dive right in to the new year. That means that tonight is going to be the last time he sees all of his friends for awhile; the last time he’s going to see  _Dan_  for awhile. And that’s where the Agreement comes into play.

He’d tried to push the Agreement to New Years, but Suzy had insisted on Christmas - “So there’s some breathing room before we all come back to work,” she said firmly, and far too logically for him to even bother arguing with her - so it had to be tonight. Arin picks at a rough spot on the table, trying to ignore the sudden racing of his heart. Tonight. Tonight is the night he’s finally going to tell Dan how he feels.

And how he feels is - well, is something he’s been smothering for far longer then he’d care to admit. Is something he’s kept in the back of his mind, something he’s beaten down time and time again as the little voice inside his head poked, prodded, and needled at him that ‘you can’t ignore this forever’. And that little voice had been right, had gotten louder over time, had practically yelled at him every time Dan shot a smile his way, or laughed, or threw an arm around Arin’s shoulders, or brushed his hair back from his face or, hell, did so much as breathe in Arin’s presence until, one day, it had all bubbled to the surface with such sure and sudden intensity that Arin had to excuse himself to the restroom in the middle of recording an episode for fear that he wouldn’t be able to prevent himself from kissing Dan right then and there. He’d faked an upset stomach and camped out in the bathroom until he finally convinced Dan to just head home for the day, that there was no way he’d be able to record in that condition and they’d just have to pick it up tomorrow. Then he’d texted Suzy and broken down into hysterical tears that lasted the entire thirty minutes until she got there. He confessed everything to her right there in the Grumpspace bathroom, him sitting on the floor with tears drying on his cheeks and her leaning against the sink being far, far more understanding then he deserved. And the way she sat down next to him, the way she whipped out her phone and pulled up the definition of ‘polyamorous’ and showed it to him, held him, told how she wasn’t mad, how he wasn’t disgusting or unfaithful for maybe being a little in love with someone else, reminded him exactly why he’d fallen in love with her in first place.

Arin had thought, at first, with accepting how he felt and admitting it to someone, to the person he cared most about in the world, he’d be able to get over it faster, but that wasn’t what had happened at all. Because Dan kept on being Dan (wonderful, funny, warm, lovable Dan), and Suzy kept being Suzy (wonderful, encouraging, understanding, but stubborn and insistent as all hell Suzy), and that was where the Agreement had come from. Arin knew, realistically, that telling Dan was the right thing, that if he kept hiding how he felt it was going to put a strain on their friendship and their working relationship, and the longer he waited the worse it would be. He had no delusions of Dan liking him back, for a whole fucking host of reasons, not the least of which being Dan’s heterosexuality and reluctance towards commitment, but he knew Dan well enough, trusted him enough, to believe that Dan at least wouldn’t be mad at him, or disgusted with him, or any of that. It would be awkward at first, sure, but once it was out in the open they would at least be able to talk through it, the polite but definite rejection would be out in the open, and Arin would be able to work towards getting the fuck over it. It would be for the best.

But still. But _still_. The thought of owning up to it, of actually  _telling_  Dan he liked him as more than just a friend was the scariest fucking prospect in the entire world, and that’s the reason why Suzy had to pin him down on a deadline for it. And she was right, the time apart from each other would give them time to process everything, and would prevent their work schedule from getting fucked up as a result, but this day had arrived far, far sooner than Arin had expected it to. But it was here, it was today, and no matter how long he waited, he knew it would never get any easier. So it might as well be tonight. Tonight. Tonight is the night he’s finally going to tell Dan how he feels.

He jumps a little when Suzy walks into the kitchen, sweeping her hair up into a ponytail.

“Good morning,” she says drowsily, draping her arms over his shoulders and giving him a brief squeeze and a kiss on the top of the head. “What are you doing up so early?”

“Sorry if I woke you up,” he says in lieu of an answer, relaxing back into her touch. He already feels infinitely more calm, more stable, now that she’s up, but he hates to think she’s losing out on sleep because of him.

“You didn’t,” she reassures, rubbing his shoulders. “God, you’re tense. Are you still thinking about tonight?”

He doesn’t answer her immediately, and she sighs deeply, her hands sliding off his arms and onto the back of the chair. “You know it’s gonna be fine, right?”

“Yeah, yeah, I know, it’s just. You know.” He chuckles humorlessly. “Just like the scariest fucking thing in the world. That’s all. But at least it’s gonna be all over with after tonight.”

It’s Suzy who stays quiet for a beat too long this time, and he twists in the chair to look at her; her lips are pursed and there’s a slight furrow to her brow. He’s typically pretty good at reading her expressions, having spent over a decade getting familiar with them, but the look in her eyes now isn’t one that he can decipher immediately. “What?”

“Nothing,” she says, turning away from him and walking towards the fridge. “Are we out of eggs? I forgot to buy more but I feel like there are some in the back somewhere.”

“No, really. What is it?”

She opens the fridge and peers into it, but he can tell she isn’t really looking for the eggs. “Just…you know.” She sounds calm and nonchalant, like she’s trying not to make him nervous, which of course immediately has him on edge. “If he were to like you back, you know that I’d be okay with you dating him, right?

He frowns automatically, because of all the things he maybe anticipated coming out of her mouth that statement was sure as hell not one of them.

“That’s not gonna happen.” It comes out a little harsher and flatter than he means it to, but, really, why would she try to get his hopes up like that when he’s spent so much time beating them down?

“Yeah, sure,” she says dismissively, in that ‘I-don’t-feel-like-arguing-with-you’ tone of voice, and before he can retort she’s clanking things around in the fridge and letting out a victorious “Aha!” as she pulls out a carton of eggs.

“It’s not gonna happen, Suze,” he says insistently. “It’s just not, okay? And I’m alright with that, I’ve accepted it, so you don’t have to say that just to cheer me up, okay?”

“I know I don’t,” she says. “I just thought that you should know. Just in case, right?” She smiles a strange half-smile, one he’s not sure he’s ever seen her make, and lifts up the open egg carton to smell. “Ew, fuck, these are crazy expired. Gross.” She sets the carton down on the counter. “How do you feel about oatmeal instead?”

“I’ll make it,” he says quickly, opening up the cabinet. She’s got a million other things to do, and besides, he needs to keep his hands busy.

She gives him a warm smile and a kiss on the cheek before she exits the kitchen, and a few minutes later he hears the shower tick on. He stares blankly at the wall while he stirs the oatmeal, trying to ignore the bubble of hope that has formed, despite himself, in the bottom of his chest.

* * *

  
It doesn’t help that they’re the first people to arrive at the Grumpspace for the party; it gives Arin ages to do very little but worry, even though Suzy puts him to work setting up various tables and chairs while she rushes around putting little last minute flourishes on everything. It’s a little bit colder than Suzy anticipated it being, so Arin passes his suit jacket over to her and she gratefully shoves her bare arms into it (she might be shivering, but he’s sweating like a pig - he just hopes it doesn’t soak through his shirt).

Arin’s heart just about jumps out of his chest when he sees the door swing open about forty minutes before the party is set to begin, but he relaxes upon seeing that it’s only Ross and Holly, the former pulling off a suit far better than Arin could ever hope to (he’d never admit that to Ross in a million years), and the latter wrapped in a gauzy pink dress, which she’s chosen to pair with tightly laced black combat boots. Holly bustles over to Suzy almost immediately and soon the two are deep in conversation, which Arin is grateful for. It’ll take Suzy’s mind off of worrying she’s forgotten something essential. Ross, meanwhile, meanders over to Arin.

“You look like you’re gonna throw up,” is the first thing out of his mouth as he approaches, looking Arin up and down. “Did you eat something bad?”

“Yeah, Del Taco,” Arin says spitefully, taking a jab at one of Ross’s favorite restaurants. A pouty look crosses Ross's face immediately, but he doesn’t retaliate; he seems to have picked up on Arin’s anxiety.

“No, but really, are you okay, man?” Ross asks him, genuine worry in his voice, and Arin feels a sudden wave of affection and gratitude for Ross wash over him. Arin’s half tempted to confide in him about The Agreement (Ross is one of his oldest friends, and he’d never judge him for it in a million years), but now isn’t the time, he decides. He works up a small smile to offer to Ross as reassurance.

“I’m fine, dude, really,” he says, and if there’s a lack of conviction in his voice Ross doesn’t comment on it, instead changing the subject to an animation project he needs Arin’s input on. Arin’s grateful for the distraction and eagerly throws himself into the task of bouncing ideas back and forth with Ross.

He’s all but forgotten about The Agreement when the other guests start to show up, but once the party has officially started, and Dan and Barry have yet to arrive, the lump of worry returns. Ross has wandered off to talk to one of Holly’s friends, and Arin makes an attempt to mingle with the other party-goers, but his gaze is permanently fixed on the door, and most of his conversation partners pick up on his lack of interest within a few minutes and excuse themselves with embarrassed smiles. He’d feel guilty about the shit hosting job he’s doing if he wasn’t so preoccupied. He’ll let Suzy scold him about it later.

He’s getting a glass of punch (goddamn, why is his mouth so dry?) when the door swings open a final time, and suddenly, suddenly, Dan is there. He and Barry are sharply dressed, and Dan has even made some sort of attempt to tame his hair; it’s slicked back, but several curls have already crept back towards his face, apparently unimpressed by the layer of gel attempting to hold them back. Dan steps through the doorway and makes eye-contact with Arin immediately, and suddenly it’s like no one else is in the room but the two of them. Dan grins at him and Arin smiles back, suddenly feeling flushed. He looks down at the punch bowl and busies himself with the paddle, somehow dropping it into the bowl. Punch splashes everywhere, but mostly onto his shirt, and he lets out a quiet and emphatic “Fuck,” before abandoning the punch to go fetch a napkin.

He swipes at the wet patches on his shirt, mentally berating himself for being a fucking idiot, and the Suzy is at his elbow, passing back his suit jacket.

“I thought you were cold.”

“Your shirt’s all wet,” she points out, and takes over wiping at the stains while he puts the jacket back on. Once he’s got it buttoned up she stares up at him expectantly.

“Yes?”

She looks pointedly across the room at Dan and he groans.

“He just got here! Don’t you think I should wait till the end of the night to ruin the party for him?”

She sighs at him. “It’s not going to ruin his night. Besides, I thought you’d want to have it over with.”

He does, more than anything, but every moment before Dan knows the truth seems so infinitely precious, for some reason that Arin can’t quite explain. Maybe it’s because he doesn’t know how long it’ll be until Dan smiles at him like that again, until he’s genuinely and truly happy to see Arin instead of feeling awkward, uncomfortable, maybe even a little disgusted. He just wants things to stay the way they are for as long as they can.

Suzy reaches out and puts a hand over his, stroking his thumb, and he squeezes back. “It’s never going to get any easier,” she says finally, and he knows she’s right, he knows, he knows, so he sucks in his breath and scans the crowd for Dan.

He’s talking to Ross and Holly, in the middle of laughing at something one of them has said, but he glances up when Arin looks at him as if his gaze holds weight, like he can feel Arin’s glances as acutely as if Arin had reached out and touched him. He smiles again, but there’s a tinge of confusion, concern, to the smile that makes Arin wonder if he looks as sick as he feels.

He turns back to Suzy, kisses her briefly, and slips his hands out of hers as he moves decisively across the room towards Dan. He walks up just as Ross is finishing a story, and waits for Dan to finish laughing before tapping him on the elbow. Dan looks at him with a warm look in his eyes and Arin’s heart gives a painful throb, but he swallows it down, buries it. He’s doing this now. Like ripping off a bandaid.

“Can I talk to you for a second?” he mutters, half hoping Ross and Holly won’t notice (they do, of course, but graciously pretend to be talking about something extremely important to one another). “Alone?”

Dan gives that confused smile again, but immediately straightens up from where he’s been slouched against the wall. “Sure,” he says.

As they begin to move out of the throng of people, Arin hears Ross call after them, “Bring me some punch when you come back!” Arin thinks absently that punch is going to be the last thing on Dan’s mind when this conversation is over.

Arin lets the two of them into the spare recording room, shoving a couple of cardboard boxes out of their way and shutting the door behind him. He leans heavily against the door, and though he feels Dan looking at him he can’t bring himself to return the gaze. His heart is slamming painfully against his ribs and for a moment Arin wonders if he’s going to have a heart attack.

Dan is the one who breaks the silence. “Is something going on?” he asks, gentle, concerned. “You look like hell, man.”

A short, choked laugh makes its way out of Arin’s throat. “Yeah,” he says hoarsely. “I bet I do.”

“What’s going on?” Dan asks again. The worry in his voice heightens and he steps closer to Arin. “Are you alright? Did something…happen?”

“No,” Arin blurts out. “I mean…nothing happened, no one’s hurt or anything like that, I just-“ He gulps in air, collects himself. Forces himself to look up at Dan, meeting his confused, sympathetic gaze head-on. “I have to. I have to tell you something. Something I probably should have told you a really, really long time ago. And I-“ His voice breaks mid-sentence and he has to blink to keep the tears out of his eyes. “Please don’t hate me after this.”

“Of course not,” Dan says quickly. He reaches out, puts a hand on Arin’s forearm. “Of course I won’t, you can tell me anything. I could never hate you, man, I promise.”

Arin looks up at him, and he lets himself drink in this moment, lets himself look at Dan like he never lets himself look at Dan. He takes in every part of him, the flyaway brown curls barely held down by the hair gel, the exact shape and color of his warm, brown eyes, the curve of his mouth and the angles of his cheekbones. He looks like he’s trying to make a map of Dan’s face, a snapshot in his mind, so no matter what happens, he’ll never forget what he looks like at this moment. And he takes in, too, exactly what he feels, that warm, low sensation of what he can only describe as adoration, and he holds it against his heart like it’s the last time he’ll ever feel it. This is the last time he’ll ever be allowed to let himself feel it.

“I like you. A lot,” Arin says slowly. “And I’m not covering it up with any of that ‘no homo’ bullshit this time, because I can’t, I can’t do it, I’m so goddamn tired of lying to you because _I like you_ , I might even love you. You’re my best friend and I’m always going to love you as a friend and I never, ever meant to love you as more than a friend, but I can’t help it. God knows I’ve tried to stop. You should have seen how I cried when I realized how I felt but no matter what I said or did I couldn’t make it go way, and I’m telling you because you have the right to know and I _need_  you to know, because I’m never, ever going to stand a chance of getting over it unless I’m totally honest with you.” He thinks that he should pause, let Dan have some time to react, but the words are pouring out of him now and he’s helpless to stop them. “And I don’t want you to be mad, or disgusted, or anything like that, but I know that this is gonna be hard for you to hear, and I’m so, so sorry, Dan, I’m so sorry, I didn’t want this to happen, and I’m _sorry_.” He thinks he might be crying but he can’t tell, he can’t focus on anything except Dan.

Dan who looks. Blank. Not even surprised, or shocked, or angry, or anything, just…blank. He’s frozen with his hand still on Arin’s shoulder, and Arin doesn’t want to shake him out of it but he needs Dan to say something, _anything_. So he reaches up and touches Dan’s hand, once, gently, and Dan seems to come alive again. He takes a step back from Arin, pulling away from the contact, and Arin’s heart sinks into the ground. He feels like he’s going throw up. Dan turns to his face the wall, away from Arin. He still doesn’t speak.

“Dan?” He risks asking, and his voice sounds weak and terrified, even to his own ears.

“I…don’t know what to say,” Dan says, quietly. He doesn’t sound angry, still, and it’s as relieving as it is terrifying. Anger might be better than this. “…How long?”

“I’ve known for a few months, but probably longer than that, honestly,” Arin replies softly.

“Suzy,” Dan says, and it’s not even a question, but suddenly Arin is rushing to explain himself.

“She knows, she was the first person I told, I mean, she’s the only one who knows, and she’s okay, she understands, she made me agree that I was going to tell you, tonight, so…so if you needed like. Time. To process this, we have…” he trails off. “We have time.”

Dan doesn’t say anything to that, and Arin wishes he could see his face. He needs something, anything, from Dan, needs to know how he feels, he _has_  to. “Please say something,” he says after a few long moments of silence.

Dan turns back to him. He still looks blank, almost like he doesn’t quite know where he is or what he’s doing here. “I…” he says slowly, and then he shakes his head. “I don’t hate you, and I’m not mad, I just…I don’t know how to feel, you know?” He gives a weak smile, but there’s very little behind it. “I don’t…I’m sorry, I don’t…you know. Feel that way.”

It hurts to hear it, even though he knew it was coming, but Arin stomachs it, shakes his head, lifts his hands up. “I know, dude, I know. I didn’t expect you to. You just. You needed to know.”

Dan nods slowly. “Yeah, I. I did.” He looks at his feet. “I think…Suzy was right. About the needing time to process.” He stares past Arin, at the door, and Arin steps quickly out of the way.

Dan steps forward, and suddenly they’re so close that Arin could count every one of Dan’s eyelashes if he wanted, can smell the hair gel and the faintest hint of the punch on his breath. Dan looks at him for a long, long time, almost searchingly, and Arin wonders what he’s seeing, what he’s hoping to find.

“I’ll see you. After Christmas,” Dan says, and then he’s gone. The door clicks closed behind him.

Arin slides silently down the wall, wraps his arms around his knees, but somehow, miraculously, does not cry.

* * *

 

  
When he rejoins the party, Dan is nowhere to be found. Ross and Barry are both giving him odd looks, but he ignores them, holes himself up in a corner, and everyone has the good sense to leave him alone as the party goes on. To Arin it feels like it lasts an eternity, or maybe only mere seconds, but either way, eventually, the room is empty and Suzy is standing beside him, the two of them looking out over tables full of abandoned solo cups. One of the steamers that Suzy so delicately arranged on the ceiling has fallen directly into the punch bowl.

They clean up and drive home in silence. She offers no reassurances, asks no questions, and he’s grateful, because the last thing he wants to do right now is talk about it. He needs time to process just as much as Dan does. And even though he feels heartbroken, empty, raw, he’s also strangely calm. Peaceful, somehow. It’s finished. The truth is out there. His biggest fears didn’t come true. And now what happens next is out of his hands. So when they pull into the driveway and he takes the key out of the ignition, he gives Suzy a small smile, and she smiles warmly back, and somehow, that’s all he needs to know things are going to be okay. Some way, somehow, things are going to be okay.

* * *

 

  
Arin and Suzy know the exact number of minutes it takes to get from their house to the airport while accounting for possible traffic, have calculated exactly how long they need to get ready and load the car and lock up the house and double check that they have everything one final time, and yet, they’re still running late. Arin is tossing suitcases in the back of the car and Suzy is turning the whole house over looking for their boarding passes. He has the car in reverse with his foot on the brake pedal when she sprints out of the house and all but leaps into the car. He peels out of the driveway before she even has her seat belt fully on.

“If there’s no traffic we can still make it,” she’s saying, and then gasps as she glances into the rear view mirror. “Stop!”

Arin slams on the brakes, about to ask what she’s forgotten, but the words die on his lips as he looks into the mirror. A car has pulled up in front of their house and someone is getting out of it, running after their car, waving his arms, someone with a head of flyaway brown curls.

Arin wrenches the car into park and gets out before he can even register what he’s doing. Another car on the road honks loudly and swerves around him. He feels like he’s sleepwalking as Dan runs towards him, slowing to a jog until they’re right in front of one another.

“You’re still here,” Dan pants out. “I didn’t think I was going to make it in time.”

“What are you…” Arin starts, but Dan is already stepping closer, talking over him.

“I know I’m making you late for your flight but I couldn’t let you go without seeing you. I can’t let you go off for two weeks without you knowing.”

“Knowing what?” His heartbeat has started to pick up, like his body understands what’s happening even though his brain hasn’t quite caught up with him yet.

Dan reaches out and puts both his hands on either side of Arin’s face, cupping his cheeks and looks at him so tenderly that he forgets, for a fraction of a second, how to breathe. Dan’s fingers are shaking against his skin.

“I fucked up so bad yesterday. So bad,” Dan says. “I couldn’t sleep at all when I got home, and when Barry came back from the party I…I told him everything, and he made me realize what a total fucking idiot I was being.” Dan laughs and he manages to sound elated and terrified all at once. “Because you’re like. One of the most important people in the entire world to me, maybe the most important, and people don’t think about their best friends the way I think about you. They just don’t. I’m so fucking stupid.”

Arin stands there, struck dumb, and there’s a million things he wants to say, probably, but he can’t force a single one out. Mostly he’s wondering if he’s about to wake up. But Dan’s hands against his cheeks are so warm and so real. He can feel every single callous on his fingertips.

“I’m scared out of my fucking mind,” Dan says to him, his voice shaking. “I thought I was too old to be surprised by anything about myself but I was wrong, and there’s so much baggage and shit there that I don’t even wanna _start_  unpacking right now, but I owe you an apology and I just wanted you to know that I love you. You’re my best friend and you scare me to death and you’re about to miss your flight but I love you too and I couldn’t stand for you to go another minute thinking that I might hate you or something because I don’t. And I don’t know what the fuck is gonna happen now or what we’re gonna do but I needed you to know, because fuck, dude, you deserve it after all the stupid bullshit I just put you through.”

Dan’s out of breath by the time he finishes talking. He stands there, chest heaving, staring at Arin with wild eyes. Waiting. Waiting for him to say something.

And Arin can’t find the words but before he knows it he is laughing, laughing so hard that he can barely stand upright, and he can’t explain to Dan that he’s not laughing at him but surely Dan knows by the way Arin crushes his forehead into Dan’s chest and laughs until there are tears coming down his cheeks, because Dan wraps his arms around Arin like he’ll never let him go and he, too, is laughing, his skinny chest shaking against Arin’s skull.

“We’re so dumb, dude,” Arin gasps out, finally looking up at Dan. “Holy shit, we’re both so fucking dumb.”

“I _know_ ,” Dan says, eyes sparkling, and the next second his lips are pressed against Arin’s. It’s basically the worst kiss ever, because they’re both still laughing too hard to be serious about it and Arin’s face is a little wet and Dan’s nose is jabbing into his cheek because they’re so unfamiliar with actually kissing each other, but it’s still their very first kiss, which, in Arin’s opinion, automatically makes it the best.

Dan is the one who breaks it, still giggling, pushing against Arin’s shoulders. “You’re gonna miss your flight, you have to go.”

They have so much they need to talk about, but there’s no time, now. There will be time, later on, but for now everything feels so amazingly right that they don’t words to define it, just yet.

“I have to go,” Arin parrots back at Dan, and gives him one more kiss just because he _can_ , and isn’t that about the most amazing thing in the world?

And then he’s back in the car, hauling ass down the street because fuck are they late, and Suzy is beaming at him the passenger seat and Dan is waving goodbye in the rearview mirror and he feels like he’s flying, flying, and nothing can bring him down from it, not even the L.A. traffic and the mad dash to get to their gate before the plane takes off without them. He doesn’t know what’s going to happen next, but he’s married to the most amazing woman in the entire world, and he’s kissed Dan Avidan on the mouth, and knowing that is enough for now. More than enough for now.


End file.
